Springoo

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HOW TO TICK PEOPLE OFF 1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies. 2. In the memo field of all your checks, write “for sexual favors.” 3. Specify that your drive-through order is “TO-GO.” 4. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your [...]

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How to write a paper in college/university: 1. Sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a well lit place in front of your computer. 2. Log onto MSN and ICQ (be sure to go on away!). Check your email. 3. Read over the assignment carefully, to make certain you understand it. 4. Walk down to [...]

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Courtroom Quotations The following quotations are taken from official court records across the nation, showing how funny and embarrassing it is that recorders operate at all times in courts of law, so that even the slightest inadvertence is preserved for posterity. * Lawyer: “Was that the same nose you broke as a child?” * Witness: [...]

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